Ask Anything: Seal


How to break seal of a girl??

This is a question that we often get in classroom workshops, and it’s great that we got this as a web question because there are a lot of myths circulating about this topic.

I’m assuming that by “seal,” you’re referring to the hymen, which is a membrane surrounding the vaginal opening. This membrane tends to wear out as one gets older, through day-to-day activities like walking, playing sports, horseback riding, or masturbation, all of which can reduce the size or consistency of the hymen. To make sure that you have a good visual, in a vast majority of cases, hymens are not like a glass window that has to be broken, but more like a donut or a large spider web.

So, by the time somebody with a vagina decides to have (vaginal) penetrative sex for the first time there are often already openings in their hymen. We often attribute the bleeding during first vaginal penetration to the “breakage” of the hymen, and that’s often what we mean when we say someone has “lost their virginity”. However, the hymen is not the seal of virginity. More often than not, the cause of bleeding during the first penetration(s) is less the hymen itself and more other factors like stress and/or not knowing yet what works for your body. This combination will probably make your body tense and your vagina less lubricated, which can make penetration harder or more painful, and could cause some bleeding. Some ways to counter this would be by letting yourself take your time and figure out what feels right for you, communicating openly with your partner(s) about the process, and having plenty of lube on hand to use…and even after your first few times, lube can be one of your best partners whenever you’re having sex. You can always get safer sex supplies, including lube, for free at Head & Hands!

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Recent Comments

  1. hey guys i am 16 years old and had sex with my bf but the blood never came out i want to know that how to close vagina seal or vagina again like before so my husbnd dont get to know that i was used before ???? help me pleaee.

    • Thank you so much for commenting on our previous answer, and sorry it took us a little while to get back to you! It is important to address virginity and bleeding, because these are subjects about which a lot of youth have questions, since there are many myths that surround them.
      About the vaginal seal, I believe you are talking about the hymen (membrane surrounding the vaginal opening). It is important to note that not everyone who has a vagina is born with a hymen. Some people have one and some don’t. The hymen can be many different shapes, textures, sizes and thicknesses. Some have small or big holes, but they rarely cover the whole opening of the vagina, because if that were the case, menstrual blood would not come out.

      The hymen can disintegrate through day-to-day activities like walking, playing sports, horseback riding, or masturbation, all of which can reduce the size or consistency of the hymen. This skin membrane has no biological purpose. You get to decide what value you give to it. Often times, the loss of virginity is associated with the rupture of the hymen which will cause bleeding. This is a social discourse that does not reflect reality, because reality is much more diverse.

      Bleeding is not an automatic sign that it’s your first time or your hymen has broken. It is often linked to not yet knowing what works for you and your body, and also just the stress that can come with sex with a new person. It can limit lubrication and cause some micro-tears in the vagina that could then provoke some bleeding. So, if you bled during your first vaginal penetration, it does not mean that you will bleed next time. The opposite can also happen. It is possible to bleed even if it is not the first time you have vaginal penetration, because each penetration is different: positions, penis, objects, lubrication, stress, emotions and time.

      Your body is your own and you get to decide what you do with it and what value you give to it. So, if having a closed» vagina has significant importance to you, that is your decision, as long as you know that it is your body, and the decisions you make are your own. Although we often hear language like ‘used’ referring to girls and women having sex, we are all people, not objects! Your partners should not see you as something to be used, but as a person who has choices and desires about the sex you have.

      There is an operation that exists to close the vaginal opening. However, this operation does not assure you that there will be bleeding for the next vaginal penetration, and, since it is a medical operation, includes some risks. You’d have to speak with a doctor to find out more information about this.

      Sense Project on November 26, 2014 at 7:10 pm

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